Lies and falsehoods, Padfoot!

There was this bit (what's the real word..Oh yeah. Segment.)err...segment on the news tonight about the new books teenagers are reading.

It basically said that they were trashy smut disguised as novels. One was about a father sleeping with his daughter, one was about a bunch of girls planning an "oral sex party" (entitled The Rainbow Club, or something like that. More on that later.) and one was about a teacher seducing and screwing her student.

My first thought was "Wow. That's as bad as fanfiction. At least fanfic authors are fairly anonymous and not making money off their smut."

My second thought was "I wonder what the story'd be like if they found out the things teenagers read on the internet on fanfic sites? Ah, if only they knew. These novels are the least of their worries when it comes to corrupting teens, let me tell you."

And my third thought was "Well...Anything sounds bad when you discribe it like that. We even read some pretty scandalous books in English this year if you break them down into one sentence focused on the bad bits."

Observe:

Their Eyes Were Watching God: A woman has three husbands; one who makes her do all the work, one who is possessive and abusive, and one who gets rabies and whom she eventually kills.

Othello: Man thinks his wife is cheating on him, so he smothers her, only to find out she did nothing wrong; at which point he kills himself.

MacBeth: Man kills king, then hires men to kill best friend and enemy's entire family, then has head chopped off by enemy.

See? Pretend you know nothing about those stories and just read that short description. What impression do you get? Anything sounds bad when you condense it into one sentence.

Then I had to figure out how to NOT tell my parents why I laughed so hard at the cover of the Rainbow Party book, which showed various shades of lipstick in bright colors; the reason for my hilarity being that Kayla Bossi explained to several people once exactly what it meant to "make a rainbow" and then told me I should get some female friends together and do it for Phil. (Who I was dating at the time.) I think she may have even volunteered herself and Lauren.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

(Oh. Some of you don't know why that's gross do you? Allow me to explain. THIS NEXT BIT HERE IS A BIT R OR EVEN X RATED. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! "Making a rainbow" is when a group of girls all put on different colored lipsticks, and then give the same guy blowjobs, thereby making a rainbow in a place where no rainbow should be.)

All together now: Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!

Current Mood: cold