Lies and falsehoods, Padfoot!

You can tell I'm bored today, cause I keep updating.

I just watched Miley on Hannah Montana get an apple out of a vending machine. WTF? Since when do they have fruit vending machines in high schools?

Speaking of which, I love Hannah Montana. And I am not ashamed. This show is hilarious. I was listening to my new Hannah Montana sountrack yesterday while I glued dirty slashy fanfic quotes to a poster for Nora. And I thought "This is odd." It was like when I had to take my Eminem cd out to put in the Hannah Montana one. I am truly a person of wide and varied tastes.

Also, am I the only person who wonders who Mr. Krabs slept/spawned with to get Pearl? How does a crab get a whale for a daughter? Was he married? Is she adopted? Why am I thinking about this?

And finally, a story I heard about my six year old cousin Roahan. One day he went to the bathroom, and forgot to zip up his zipper. So he comes back and his teacher says "Roahan, your fly is open." Roahan has never heard it called that, so he's like "What?" and the teacher points. At which point Roahan says, "Oh, my man cave is open!" and the teacher is like "What?!?" and Roahan says "It's where I keep the beast."

I died when I heard that. OF THE HILARITY.

So we went to Boston yesterday. I spent most of my time with Vanessa, Gerry, Hannahmylove, and Lydia. I am going to relate the best parts here, and try to avoid a play by play.

Bus ride there was fairly uninteresting, besides Paul and Karla bowdaggling (Anna how do you spell that exactly?) in the back...

Once in the city, we sort of, kind of, might have, maybe, hit a parked truck. But only a little.

Then Vanessa really had to pee, but there was nowhere to pee. So we tried to distract her by singing. We sang the FUN song from SpongeBob, and then we made up new words, while blindly following Ron, who had NO IDEA where we were going...

First Verse:

F is for Friends who get lost together
U is U really have to pee
N is for aNywhere, where the Hell are we? Out here in this big city!

Evil Verse:

F is for Fuck you, I hate you all
U is my Undeniable hate
N is Not wanting to be out here, over this smelly grate!

Last Verse:

F is for Frolicking without a damn clue
U is for Under the ugly sky
N is for Nazis in the bathroom at McDonalds, why oh why oh why? (Because they wouln't just let us use the bathroom)

Me:(In the middle of a sentence) SQUIRREL! (Well it ran really close to me!)

Vanessa and I ran into the middle of a flock of pigeons and scared them. It was fun.

Me: We're back on the Freedom Trail!
Vanessa: Yes! Fight the power!

We also went to this store called Anthropologie (Yes I spelled that right) and thy had the most awesome Alice in Wonderland pop-up book EVER, and a spoon that looked like a plane. Because what do you do when you want a little kid to eat and they won't? You tell them the spoon is a plane, that needs to go in the hanger, usually while making appropriate sound effects. This spoon removes all need for imagination. Vanessa and I laughed so hard we couldn't talk.

PAUSE FOR DEEP THOUGHT OF THE DAY! I do not know if I was then a man dreaming he was a butterfly, or if I am now a butterfly dreaming he is a man. THAT IS ALL FOR DEEP THOUGHTS.

Vanessa:(Because she and I used to be Siamese twins, but we got separated) You're my sister once removed.

Sign: NO VEHICLES ON THE SIDEWALK! (And there was a car parked on the sidewalk a little ways away.)

Vanessa tried to put the cap to the Ibuprofen (And I don't know if I spelled that right) on her water bottle, which did not work.

Gerry: (After buying Vanessa a ring) Do you LOVE it? (Kinda have to hear his tone and see his face for this to be funny...)

This brings us to the Blue Man Group show, which was FANTASTIC and HILARIOUS. They are really truly funny guys.

And finally, the bus ride home.

During which, the bus driver, for some reason, felt the need to SHUT THE FUCKING HEAT OFF WTF!?!

But it was a good trip nonetheless.